My Thoughts on Marriage

6:23 AM Unknown 0 Comments

You see, people at my age especially in my country is starting to talk about this marriage thing. I, being me, don't really care about this stuff. I mean, well, marriage is religion thingy, and you know me when it comes to religion. But I'll try to be fair here, I think yeah it's not a bad thing, but do we need to do that? Do we have to that? Is it a MUST? My answer is no. Definitely not. I'll try to explain it here.

"Marriage is a key to happiness". Yeah... and also new financial problems, in-house violence, family complex, and repression of freedom. They're there, I just don't understand why people can't see them, and only see the happy stories. I'm guessing that people who thinks that marriage leads to happy life is influenced by the romanticism that has been enormously promoted by the media and the culture. You know, the mindset that 1+ 1 + forever = good. But they forget the fact that broken families exist, and children who have to suffer the depression of their parent's divorce. If there are so many things that could go wrong, then why do people see it like it's a dreamland? I'm not saying that happy marriage is unlikely. What I'm saying is marriage is not the absolute recipe for happiness. When you decide you're gonna marry, you roll the dice. Just like every other choices you make in life.

Will I ever get married? I don't know. How can I answer that. What's funny to me is people around me is so damn sure that they are gonna married somehow. "My wedding will be...", "My first child name will be...". I can't help but thinking that these people are only following what the society is telling them since they're kids. They are indoctrinated that when they are grown up they're gonna meet that special someone, have a relationship, get married, and have kids. And they HAVE to do that, unless they will bring shame to their families, the society will look at them in a different way, that they are somewhat pathetic. The tale that a person's life quality is improved after the wedding is effecting them. Some friends of mine even mentioned that to marry is the goal of their life! Wow. How...deep. <-- sarcastic

In some discussions with my friends, they mentioned that the point of marriage is to start a family, and everybody should do that because if you don't you'll end up alone and miserable. What bugs me is that they see unmarried life as always referred to loneliness and unhappy life. This is where I object, because to me happy isn't shallowly measured by a ring on your finger. In fact, in more cases, married people tend to be more stressed because they carry more burden and responsibility.

Here's one fact, we, men, are designed to fertilize all women in the world. Haha I mean, we're biologically programmed to do that, that's the design, you can't deny that. But if you can fight that, and focus all the desire into just one person, then good. I'm into that.

Here's the part where I'm gonna talk about sex. Because for some people this is what marriage is all about. I live in a dumb dumb country where someone's sex life becomes everyone's matter. You can go to jail for pre-marital sex here! So, in order to make it legal (and avoid sin), they marry. So they can fuck. For some people, people I know, marriage is nothing more than just legitimization of fucking. I was like, really? That's your "happy"? I would rather be in a place where sex is considered as normal human behavior (which it is), not as a mistake or a sin. Not because I'm crazy about fucking, but at least we would be less hypocrites.

I have no spiritual beliefs, so I can only see marriage as one thing...commitment. It's how you show the world that you take your couple seriously and decide to live your everyday with her. Because despite of everything I've said, I believe in love. I believe in a certain feeling that makes you feel more comfortable being with a certain person than the other. And it's sweet. How can I mock that? Marriage is a great concept, it's just misunderstood by most people, because the stupid indoctrination of religion, law, culture, media, and human desire of mating.

You know, following what the society tells me is never been my style. I ask questions. Why do we have to be married? Why is it a must? Why is it that when you're not married then your life purpose is not complete? Why can't we just be free with our choices? My point is, marriage is not a bad thing, but it is not necessarily a good thing. If I want to marry, I want it to be something I do because I choose to do it. Not because it is something that is demanded of me.