Our Respect Should Have a Limit
So, in this post I'm gonna review a case - not new, but an old case. Why? Umm, besides I have not found any good material in the news today, I think the moral of the story is something worth-sharing. So here I go..In January 2007, a German Muslim woman applied a fast-track divorce to end her marriage to the court there. The base of this action was that her husband, since the beginning of the marriage, frequently and seriously beat her. The divorce application however was turned down by the judge, Christa Datz-Winter. She, not denying the fact that the husband actually beat her, said that the couple came from Moroccan cultural milieu, where she said it was common for husbands to do such kind of thing to their wives. The Qur'an, she wrote, sanctions such physical abuse. "In this cultural background, it is not unusual that the husband uses physical punishments against the wife," she wrote.
"Men are in charge of women by [right of] what Allah has given one over the other and what they spend [for maintenance] from their wealth. So righteous women are devoutly obedient, guarding in [the husband's] absence what Allah would have them guard. But those [wives] from whom you fear arrogance - [first] advise them; [then if they persist], forsake them in bed; and [finally], strike them. But if they obey you [once more], seek no means against them. Indeed, Allah is ever Exalted and Grand."
Qur'an 4:34
-as translated by Sahih International from quran.com
*Here I cited a quotation from the Qur'an that may had encouraged the judge's decision. I have no intention whatsoever to directly insult the text, or what it means. I put it here so the readers could get the point of the story better. I do not intend to drive you to my own 'interpretation' of the text. Besides, I only copied it, I made no manipulation on the text whatsoever.
The story came to the surface in March 2007, after the woman's lawyer, Ms. Becker Rojczyk, disclosed it. Thanks to her initiatives, The Frankfurt court removed Judge Datz-Winter from the case.
"It was terrible for my client. This man beat her seriously from the beginning of their marriage. After they separated, he called her and threatened to kill her."
-Becker-Rojczyk, the woman's lawyer
Citing an article from The New York Times:
For some, the greatest damage done by this episode is to other Muslim women suffering from domestic abuse. Many are already afraid of going to court against their spouses. There have been a string of so-called honor killings here, in which Turkish Muslim men have murdered women.
...and justified in the name of 'it's their culture'...
'Respect the other's culture'. It is a statement we find often, in our elementary text books, in commercials, in religious preaching...or in everyday's conversation. Is it right? To some extend, it is. I study in multi-cultural university, in which I have seen people do things in different ways depending on their own backgrounds and culture. I find it beautiful that people can still gather, laugh, help, make friends, despite their different culture. I can only think, one thing that can make this happen is the respect we uphold to others. But sometimes in the name of 'respect', we blindfolded our eyes to the dreadful and pathetic actions people around us do. I see people making statements, "All gays should die!" I see people don't even want to get close with people from different religion because, "It's sin," they say. I see people refuse to help people in need just because they are 'different'. I see couples ended their relationship just because they come from different culture, religion, or background. They do all that because it's 'their culture'...and we should 'respect' it, nod and agree.
No... Our respect should have a limit.
If your culture, or religion, or principles, or whatever, makes you to think that "My mother's cooking is the best in the world," I will respect it. I can prove that your opinion is wrong by taking you to a 5-star restaurant and make you eat superbly delicious meal that, by any means, bested your mom's cooking. But believe me, I will still respect it. But if your so-called 'culture' is the one that allows you to beat or kill your wife, burn people alive, behead people in Friday, condemned people to hell, then my morality forbids me to 'respect' it. My respect will not extend that far that I will 'respect' such actions just because it's your 'culture'.
love the post!
ReplyDeleteLittle Miss Olen.
Thanks! Hope it changes something.
ReplyDelete